A Reddit post shared on the popular forum r/developersIndia has ignited a debate around workplace boundaries, paternity leave, and toxic managerial practices—striking a chord with thousands online.
The post, written by a software engineer who recently became a father, details a deeply distressing situation. According to the user, his newborn baby—born prematurely—had to be admitted to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) due to respiratory complications. Despite informing his manager about the situation, he claims he was still asked to take calls and handle work assignments while on leave.
“I became a father a couple of days ago… my baby was a premie… admitted to the NICU,” the user wrote, adding that he had already informed both HR and his manager about his planned two-week paternity leave months in advance.
‘Asked to work despite being on leave’ The user alleged that his manager not only disregarded his leave but also pressured him repeatedly, even invoking past performance discussions. He claimed that during a previous personal emergency—when his pregnant wife was hospitalised—he was asked to work till 3 am despite no urgent dependency.
Despite delivering a “business-critical application with zero bugs,” he said his performance rating was limited to “meet expectations.”
This time, however, he chose to push back. “Last time when I put work before my family, it was not valued. Why should I repeat it?” he wrote, adding that his manager responded with statements like “anyone can replace you.”
Internet reacts: ‘Your baby comes first’ The post quickly gained traction, with users offering advice and expressing concern over the situation.
One user wrote, “Bhai first of all, congrats and take care of your baby, that’s priority no.1. NICU situation hai, nothing comes close.” The commenter advised the new father to document all communication and escalate the matter formally to HR if needed.
Another added, “That ‘anyone can replace you’ line is a classic pressure tactic, don’t fall for it. Hiring takes money and time.”
Some users also highlighted the disparity in paternity leave policies globally. “Just two weeks of paternity leave… colleagues in Europe are getting months,” one comment read.
Others took a more direct stance, urging the employee to set firm boundaries. One user suggested avoiding all work communication during leave, stating, “When you are on leave, do not attend calls or messages. Set an out-of-office response and stick to it.”
A more critical response pointed to broader systemic issues: “The money you are earning is not giving you peace… it’s not worth working there.”